Big Egos

A big ego. It is so common in spiritual circles, so much more than anywhere else.  I keep seeing it in individuals that have supposedly been doing self-work for many years and are leaders in their fields, guiding others to healing and transformation. Several spiritual teachers have actually been recently called out on this.  Let’s not name any names.  Why is this phenomenon so prevalent in the spiritual world?

I believe that the answer is there is trauma there that has not been resolved.  Childhood wounds that require a deeper investigation, and release.

I used to think that if you are on the spiritual path you are surely a self-actualized individual. You have worked on yourself to the point where your entire existence is in service to humanity, instead of humanity being in service to you. Being a spiritual practitioner and seeker does not magically delete your big ego.

I understand that there is a healthy ego.  Healthy ego is loving yourself with all your flaws. Actually recognizing, and accepting that one has flaws is where it begins.  It usually takes a person a lifetime to establish such a sense of self.  I know because I have only just begun to do so, and I am close to fifty.

A big ego is so different than a healthy sense of self-esteem.

A big ego is camouflage for insecurity, lack of self- love,  and confidence.

You can’t be so self-absorbed and consider yourself enlightened.

Having anger issues just means you still have some more work to do.  Usually childhood wounding is the culprit with anger.  Anger is hiding deeper suppressed emotions. Finding a trauma release practitioner will help you address such hidden emotions.

Lashing out at people for being who they are is not a sign of mastery.

There are gentle ways of communication and angry ways of communication.

Pretending to be something you are not will always come back to haunt you.

People are not for you to use. People are there for you to learn from and work with.

Your perspective on a subject is not the end all of perspectives.

You, after all are human and share in the qualities of being human: human means prone to error.

No one is exempt.  I apologize if that seems harsh, it is reality.

Big ego means narcissism.  A narcissist is a wounded individual who thinks the world revolves around them.

Its nice to have a healthy sense of self and be grounded in your own being.  However, when that is blown up so much that all you see is yourself as a hero among heroes, you most likely have some more work to do.

Questions you can ask about where you are in your quest for a healthy sense of self:

Are you genuinely interested in others? Do you accept other people’s beliefs and opinions? Are you easily offended? Do you often feel superior to others?  Can you put your-self in other people’s shoes? How are your communication skills?  Do you avoid topics because they make you uncomfortable? Do you talk about topics that you feel you know best? Are you open minded? Can you accept being wrong? Are you okay with making mistakes? Do you say what you really feel, and think or are you prone to avoid or beat around the bush?

Extra credit for being extra honest with yourself  :0)