Category: ArtKeyTypes

THE DANCE

Sometimes, something magical happens when I dance.  A wave of energy begins to flow through me as I surrender to it.  I have no control over my body.  My movements are not my own. Spirit moves me. My feet are connected to the earth, my body moving to a mysterious rhythm.  It reminds me of when I paint and energy flows through my arm into the brush making spontaneous marks on the canvas. The difference is, in this case, my entire body is moving as if the ground is the canvas.This energy that is so easy to lose our self to.  Is it from above or is it from below, from heaven or is it from hell, from the sky or is it from the earth?

THE QUESTION

A question that has intrigued philosophers, scientists, religious and spiritual leaders for centuries: where is God/dess? This question  has been on my mind since I was a very young girl.   Growing up I was told that there is heaven, and hell. That I better be good and do good so as not to go to hell.  I would imagine myself in my grave being tortured, and burnt over, and over for eternity,  and that would make me want to pray and do good.  It was out of fear of eternal damnation.

These days I just ask questions that have not been asked before.  What if consciousness, god/dess  emerged from the core of the earth? What if we return to the core of the earth when we die? Perhaps this consciousness we feel comes from within the earth as opposed to some etheric god form in the heavens?

I have spent so much time in airplanes lately, just watching the earth and its many varied landscapes. She is very much a living organism. Above the clouds, a very interesting thought came to me: Our physical body is made of earth no questions there.  When we die, our body becomes earth, and our spirit or that which animates our body ? Where does it go? Major religions of the world have a theory that it either goes to heaven or to hell…well, I want to ask: What if spirit/consciousness/soul…goes back to the core of the earth? What if the creator , our creator, consciousness, is inside the earth?

THE CONNECTION

When I dance, and connect my feet to the ground, it allows me to feel that my being, the reason I am alive and able to move, is because I am animated by her, the goddess in the earth.

I have spent most of the month of July camping. I feel like I commune with the earth when I lay so close to her.  She speaks to me through visions.  The last thing she gave me was: I am you- and yes a tiara too 🙂

I live each day making sure my connection to earth is alive. I like to visualize myself connected to her core through a cord that gets stronger with each passing day.

I have noticed a growing trend in workshops within spiritual circles where individuals are encouraged to gaze into each other’s eyes.  You sit or stand across from someone you just met and gaze into their eyes. This is done for many minutes, and sometimes even hours. The goal is to realize our human connectedness ( unless I am missing something here).

I remain extremely skeptical about this practice. After participating in my fair share of such workshops this reflection needed to happen.

The great William Shakespeare once said : The eyes are the window to your soul. I believe he was spot on.  When we gaze into someone’s eyes we are connecting with their soul. There is no question about this.  I agree, this is a wonderful connection if the person infront of you is someone you wish to connect with on a soul  level.  However, what if you do not? Do you walk out? say no? not participate? Is there a space given for a ‘no’ from the facilitator?

So many nuances that are left unaddressed when running a workshop like this…it is a bit much, really, especially coming from someone talking about boundaries a few minutes before diving into this practice!

Wouldn’t it be wiser to connect on other levels and reserve the soul connection to those we truly want to keep close in our heart, and life?

I say there are MANY other ways to realize our interconnectedness, rather than merely gazing into a complete stranger’s eyes. I wrote an entire paper in 2010 on this subject (which I will have to locate and post sometime).

What I do recall is that I listed the ways in which we are able to realize how we are connected to one another… in our emotions, the way we experience happiness and sadness, fear , loss, betrayal; we are connected in birth, and death, sorrow, grief, joy, passion, we are connected in that we are all made of bones, skin and flesh, we are connected in that we all come from the same source and will return to that same place.  All these things do not require gazing into each other’s eyes to understand this truth.  What is required is listening, understanding, and communicating.  Yes, gazing into another persons eyes will deepen the sense of such a connection, if that is what we wish.

We walk into a workshop and connect with a dozen people or more, on a soul level when we haven’t even uttered a single word to them! How are we to “see” or “hear” their suffering, their success, their struggles, their joys and triumphs,  when we walk away and quickly forget their name? I do not mean to over generalize.  There is always that one exception to the rule.  I really cannot even name a handful of people I have connected to in such workshops.

I think there is so much confusion these days about what connection really is and that is why we are witnessing so much depression, isolation, and so many suicides . We are here in the flesh, so let’s learn to connect with our whole being, not just part of it?  People are feeling unheard, unseen and insignificant despite the level of success they have achieved in their life.  The reason is this superficiality that has now also leaked into something as sacred as looking into someone’s soul.  Eye gazing is a sacred matter.  One has to listen first and then see.

Let me ask you this- how many eyes have you gazed into this past year? How many of those eyes are you still in touch with until this day? Are they people you want in your life? Do they mean something to you? It is okay to be honest with yourself. There is power to honesty as there is power to understanding that we get to choose who we want to connect with spiritually.

I believe in our interconnection and at the same time, I do not wish to bring every single person that crosses my path into my soul! I believe in guarding my soul. My soul is my inner kingdom and as Ajame says: Let no one enter your inner kingdom unless they come with Love. I grew up in a culture where the importance of diverting one’s gaze was of utmost importance, especially when it comes to the two genders.  The Quran reads:

“Tell the believing men that they should reduce/lower their gaze/vision and guard their private parts…” – Sura: 24, Aya: 30

I have obviously not taken  this literally, it means to have modesty and integrity when interacting with each other.  Lately I have been really reflecting on this Aya.  My conclusion is to protect my soul, I must take this literally and not metaphorically.

Your eyes are the boundaries of  your soul.

A big ego. It is so common in spiritual circles, so much more than anywhere else.  I keep seeing it in individuals that have supposedly been doing self-work for many years and are leaders in their fields, guiding others to healing and transformation. Several spiritual teachers have actually been recently called out on this.  Let’s not name any names.  Why is this phenomenon so prevalent in the spiritual world?

I believe that the answer is there is trauma there that has not been resolved.  Childhood wounds that require a deeper investigation, and release.

I used to think that if you are on the spiritual path you are surely a self-actualized individual. You have worked on yourself to the point where your entire existence is in service to humanity, instead of humanity being in service to you. Being a spiritual practitioner and seeker does not magically delete your big ego.

I understand that there is a healthy ego.  Healthy ego is loving yourself with all your flaws. Actually recognizing, and accepting that one has flaws is where it begins.  It usually takes a person a lifetime to establish such a sense of self.  I know because I have only just begun to do so, and I am close to fifty.

A big ego is so different than a healthy sense of self-esteem.

A big ego is camouflage for insecurity, lack of self- love,  and confidence.

You can’t be so self-absorbed and consider yourself enlightened.

Having anger issues just means you still have some more work to do.  Usually childhood wounding is the culprit with anger.  Anger is hiding deeper suppressed emotions. Finding a trauma release practitioner will help you address such hidden emotions.

Lashing out at people for being who they are is not a sign of mastery.

There are gentle ways of communication and angry ways of communication.

Pretending to be something you are not will always come back to haunt you.

People are not for you to use. People are there for you to learn from and work with.

Your perspective on a subject is not the end all of perspectives.

You, after all are human and share in the qualities of being human: human means prone to error.

No one is exempt.  I apologize if that seems harsh, it is reality.

Big ego means narcissism.  A narcissist is a wounded individual who thinks the world revolves around them.

Its nice to have a healthy sense of self and be grounded in your own being.  However, when that is blown up so much that all you see is yourself as a hero among heroes, you most likely have some more work to do.

Questions you can ask about where you are in your quest for a healthy sense of self:

Are you genuinely interested in others? Do you accept other people’s beliefs and opinions? Are you easily offended? Do you often feel superior to others?  Can you put your-self in other people’s shoes? How are your communication skills?  Do you avoid topics because they make you uncomfortable? Do you talk about topics that you feel you know best? Are you open minded? Can you accept being wrong? Are you okay with making mistakes? Do you say what you really feel, and think or are you prone to avoid or beat around the bush?

Extra credit for being extra honest with yourself  :0)

A yoga teacher who eats meat?… I knew this question was heading my way at some point.  I watched a video not too long ago where Ana Forrest, a yoga teacher I admire so much and think highly of, refused to answer this question.  I totally understand how she would be at a loss for words.  It really is no one’s business!!!! Why do people go there? Why?  This woman had endured tremendous suffering. She is a warrior. In my eyes, she has shaman status. Hands down. Discrediting her by questioning her diet is lunacy!

These words I was asked are still ringing in my ears although I heard them at the end of last year.

Was that a judgement of the highest order or what?

Yes, I responded, I do eat meat, because this is how it is at this moment.  My children eat it, so I buy it and I do not wish to waste it. I also do not wish to impose any beliefs on my children, I would rather they find what they believe in.

You see, I did not get to explain that I was a vegetarian for fifteen years prior, and that I suddenly found myself contemplating eating meat.  Not because I missed it, more because it was what I thought my body required.  I had my children on a vegetarian diet. After fifteen years, I felt depleted. And so it goes that sometime in the year 2013 after abstaining completely since 1995,  I went back to eating meat. It has been a little over four years now.  It surely isn’t my go to food.  I eat very little of it, and I eat it consciously.  I know, nothing justifies killing animals.  This blog is surely not a means to justify that.  However, more than anything it is a way for me to try to understand this conundrum that I find myself contemplating and grappling with most days.

The question of ‘does it make you more awake’ if you do not eat meat, is surely a no.  Many have experienced awakened states, diet aside.

So where to begin?

I began by looking at the etymology of sacrifice. The breakdown is as follows:

sacrificus means sacrifical

sacer is sacred

Facio is to make

This evidently means sacrificing something is to make something sacred.

In any sacrifice we must destroy life in order to preserve it.

We sacrifice animals, plants, and sometimes we sacrifice ourselves.

Sacrificing ourselves is a way to mature, another aspect of the individuation process.

The key to this sacrifice is that we are fully conscious of what it is we are sacrificing.  That is what makes any act sacred. Consciousness.   Some will argue that we can in that case justify devious acts if they are done with consciousness.  I would say devious acts can never be done with consciousness.  I am talking about survival here.  Sometimes, not always,  however in most cases, we sacrifice to survive.

There are many arguments and debates about eating meat versus a plant based diet.  Believe me, I have heard, and read about the entire spectrum. As a long time practitioner of yoga I know all about this. With a lot of details from every side.  And I get it. Animals do not deserve to die. Humans do not deserve to die in wars either. So many things can go under this list: sexual abuse, domestic violence, environmental abuse…you name it…

The thing is, a lot of research surfacing these days is that plants actually feel pain.  There is no difference between an animal and a plant. Here is an interview on this topic from PRI . Animals and plants have consciousness however they do not have reasoning faculties although they have mind.  They cannot apply logic, and reason as humans do.  What distinguishes us from them is that we are able to use our mind. Our mind is the center of our world.

In table format:

Animals                 senses           nerves              consciousness/MIND    soul

Plants                    senses                                      consciousness/MIND    soul

Humans                senses           nerves              consciousness/MIND    soul       REASON/LOGIC

Yes, it gets us in trouble mostly, however, if we learn to rule our mind, it can be a blessing.  This mind retains our memories, and dreams of the future. Animals do not have access to the faculty of mind. Animals can only be in the moment, and will never remember the past or think about their future.

I have been grappling, reflecting and contemplating this topic for several years. Ever since I began eating meat again.  Not because I wish to prove myself right.  I just would like to understand why so many religions practice this. If it was one religion, I would put it aside and say ok that is nothing to look into.  When I see repeating patterns that continue through ancient times, I feel I need to understand why such patterns exist.  There is more to this than what we see and understand.

I was recently having a discussion about this with my son.  I like to challenge him sometimes just to see what he will say.  He always surprises me with his wisdom (when he is not causing trouble, that is).  As we discussed this, he intuited that eating meat is part of the alchemical process. BINGO!  That makes so much sense.  We eat it to have power over our lower nature.  In alchemy we transmute something into something completely different.  In this case our animal nature into our higher divine nature. Humans are part animal part godlike.  All ancient scriptures and texts point to this fact.  I recall reading something that speaks to this in some text a while back, and I just cannot for the life of me recall what it was. I sure hope I find it soon because I wish to read it again.  Yes, it does make sense now why so many religions would propagate this.

One more event I wish to share around this topic is that last year in November while I was volunteering at the Science and Non-duality Conference in San Jose, California,  I was assigned to help out at Charles Eisenstein’s workshop: Emissaries from the Future.  I hesitated at first and then decided to participate.  Charles had us go into a meditation where we met our own personal emissary from the future and got to ask them questions about what life on earth would be hundreds of years into the future. This was a very emotional exercise for me, which I will not go into full detail here, however what is of relevance are the words of my emissary whom I could not help but ask what her name was, and she replied: Bee-A- Trees (and emphasized that it is written in that manner and not Beatrice).  Bee-A-Trees answered my question of ‘will we still be eating meat many hundreds of years from today?’ with ‘yes’ however, she could not really explain why that is. She said she could not tell me the reasons as she could not understand them in that moment. I suppose it is worth another trip into the future perhaps I can get more information on that.

I am not saying everyone needs to run out and sacrifice some sheep right now.

I wish people will hold their beliefs lightly.  It seems that sacrificing serves a purpose. Perhaps something that we cannot see or feel.  Believing in something is a choice, to each their own path, and to each their rate of evolution. We never know what circumstances someone is in when we make our hasty judgements.  In Ayruveda, bone broth is prescribed to patients with bone marrow problems such as bone cancer. Will we not sacrifice an animal to save a human life?  Is it best to let the human die, and let the animal live? Will the animal perhaps one day make a huge difference in the world? Can the animal become an activist? An artist? A poet? A nurse? A teacher?

Additionally, with so many starving populations around the world, even in America, a little morsel of meat can save a human life. Especially if that is all that is available.  Let’s not be ‘above’ eating what it is we need to survive in any given moment.  It is not a matter of rank, there is no hierarchy in survival. There is no such thing as diet elite.

I am not better or worse than you are for eating what I eat.  You are not better or worse than I am for eating what you eat.

Some of us are completely oblivious to why we eat what we eat, and that is still OKAY.

The way things are in the world, with so many catastrophic predictions, we may all find ourselves eating things we really do not wish to eat someday soon. I suppose it is our choice to starve or to survive.

I get that animals are sentient.  I love animals, I love plants, I love all of life. However, I also believe in the mystery, that there are laws in this universe that we may never have answers to.

I also believe in the ability to listen to my body’s needs in every single moment. Somedays I eat, some days I don’t, some days I drink, and on other days I remain thirsty.

Very recently, I found Hyperianism.  If you have no idea what Hyperianism is, it is a philosophy of life, a way of being.  It is a set of beliefs which seeks to establish a new- world order based on reason and mathematics.  Hyperians want to do away with faith, and religion (and can you blame them?), and replace humanity with strong, free thinking, and creative individuals. This is such a powerful message that I am sure resonates with many, not just myself.

About two months ago, Morgue’s profile showed up on my  Instagram.  As I listened to what he had to say, I could hear many truths there, and I have to admit I was very intrigued with his sword swallowing superhuman ability so I followed him.  I also was fascinated with his androgynous look.  I think humanity will be moving more towards that in the future.  Anyhow, serendipitously, I was on line when his Book Zero went on sale, which I later learned happens very rarely, so I ordered it.

As I followed I could see all the negativity Hyperians were receiving.  Humanity likes to see things in boxes, anything that does not look like or sound like what we are used to automatically becomes evil.

Shortly after reading the book, I found myself saying yes why not “I am Hyperian” yet there was this nagging feeling deep within: I recognize this as truth, the universe is mathematical no question about that, and I have always been a logical person.  Reason above all sounds like it would solve the world’s problems, yet something felt a bit unsettling (Dear Hyperians, this is just my method of reasoning.  I am engaging in dialogue not attacking or condemning). What about intuition? And what about roots?

The truth is, I believe, like the Hyperians, that the universe is mind (or consciousness), I believe that  reason and logic are important, I also believe human will is necessary, I believe religions have become about manipulation, and I believe that many systems if not all in our societies need to be over hauled.   So yes, I am with you on this Hyperians!    What I cannot get myself to accept is throwing the root of religion out the door because religion itself, the uncorrupted version of it at least the core messages and ancient truths (for those of us who study them) were meant to help humanity.  The way I see it is that religion is the root of spirituality. Religion used to be the prescription towards self-growth. Think of it as a tool that sparked the seeker to pursue further growth and prescribed certain practices that need to be followed to reach the goal.   Nowadays religion is a form of corrupt spirituality, yes, I agree.  Although all the spiritual paths seem different on the surface, they really are one and the same.  I have written this else-where and I shall repeat myself as many times as I need to: we all come from the same root and we all return to it.  Nothing will ever change this. This is guaranteed. It is the only thing we are ever certain of in a world full of uncertainty.

That aside, Hyperians and their message are being attacked and misunderstood by so many people.  The reason is no one is listening! EVERYONE is judging and projecting their tainted views on everyone else.  Just like transgender individuals have to face ridicule and assault for being who they are, and so on with all minorities and ethnicities and sexual orientations…  Each one of us is also enduring the same in our own way and usually for being exactly who we are.  Can you blame humanity for wanting to be so inauthentic?

There is a deeper aspect to this that I would like to address so please be patient with me.  I am going to do something here that some may not appreciate, I want to tie this to an incident that recently took place on FaceBook.  Shiva Rea, a long time yoga practitioner and teacher, a true and dedicated student of the path of yoga recently gave her honest and true opinion on a modern version of a form of ancient dance and yoga called Buti Yoga. Her words were taken as offense, blown out of context and became a starting ground for a war.  You can read the response she got by clicking here and this will give you an idea of what I mean by war.  I felt her words were meant as inquiry, a place to pause and question certain things instead of blindly going through the motions. Shiva was using the power of reason.  Shiva spoke of honoring the roots of yoga. Why is this such a negative thing to do? What is the problem everyone has with roots?

This is a great example demonstrating how it is really difficult to truly LISTEN.  The world is colored by our individual beliefs and we end up projecting them on what we hear.   On the other hand, the communicator has the responsibility of communicating precisely, and from the heart, their true and honest self. My dear humans, it really boils down to the basics, we have to listen as well as we speak.  We also have to speak as well as we listen.

Our ancestors didn’t have it all right, and some really messed it up for us, especially those who tainted our spiritual path with all their patriarchal dogma.  Despite this, we have to remember the work they did on our behalf. Without them we would not be here.  The least we can do is honor their pain and suffering and their wisdom that brought us to where we are. We can also go one step further and heal our dysfunctional inherited conditioning with all the tools available to us.  There is grace in embracing our roots.

Imagine a human being without a root chakra?

If the root chakra is out of balance, one cannot progress to balance the remaining chakras. What happens then?…now what if we completely  eradicate this root chakra????

I leave you with an old Arabic saying: man nakara aslahu, la asla lahu,

he who forgets his origins upholds no principles (standards).

There never was a tree without roots, and there never will be.